Back Stabbers Get Stabbed Back
by paupu fruits rox
Summary: Sora and Roxas double date with Kairi and Namine but Roxas doesn't want to. Axel plots to get rid of Sora.
1. Hate da double date

Back Stabbers Get Stabbed Back

Characters: Roxas, Sora, Kairi, Namine, Riku, Axel, Cloud, Sephiroth, Leon, Cid, and Aerith.

Chapter 1

Sora and Roxas are at the Sandlot in Twilight Town. Roxas is standing with his arms crossed and his hand on his chin. Sora is standing talking to him.

Sora "Come on Roxas, Kairi will only go out with me if you double date with Namine."

Roxas "Ughhh! (He rolls his cerulean blue eyes) I don't know. I like Namine as a friend but that's all. She's too flat for me, in the front and in the back. If you know what I mean."

Sora "Pleaeasssse! I really like Kairi, she slips me the tongue."

Roxas "Fine, just this once. Anyways, when's the date?"

Sora "Well I spent all my money on my pimpin gangsta necklace so we're going to have to go to a fast food place like …. umm McDonalds or Burger King. "

Roxas "What ever is cheaper because I'm a nobody. Xemnas never gave me an allowance, that cheap skate."

Sora "McDonalds it is. Oh yeah, the date's this Friday."

Roxas "You best get something out of this because I'm going to be pissed if u don't."

Sora "Me and you both!"

Roxas leaves to find Axel. He finds him hanging at the Usual Spot with Riku. Axel was sitting on the furnace thing and Riku is sitting on the couch.

Riku "Yeah I've always liked Kairi as more than a friend."

Axel "Really, short and dumb aren't my type."

Roxas enters the Usual Spot.

Axel "Oh, hey Roxas what's up?"

Roxas "There you are. I've been looking all over for you."

Axel "Who wouldn't be?"

Roxas "Ha ha ha you're a freaking comedian; anyways Sora is forcing me to go on a double date with Namine and Kairi."

_Axel's evil thoughts "Man Roxas has been hanging out with Sora a lot. I hate that stupid brown haired pipsqueak. I wish I could get rid of him but how?"_ Axel gets that look on his face like he has an evil plan.

Riku "Wait a sec, you're going on a date with Kairi?"

Roxas "No Sora is. I'm going with Namine but I don't like her like that."

Axel "Hey I have an idea. In the middle of the date, I'll come and tell you there is an emergency meeting and Xenmas needs to see us."

Roxas "Hey that's a great idea, so I can get out of this date."

Riku gets up and walks out with a pissed look on his face.

Roxas "What's his problem?"

Axel "You know Riku, he's always pissed about something."

Riku walks to Market Street where he finds Cloud leaning against the wall with his arms crossed and a pissed look on his face. Riku leans against the wall next to him and crosses his arms too.

Riku "Hey Cloud, who rained on your parade?"

Cloud "I heard Leon is going on a date with Aerith on Friday at McDonalds because yesterday he spent all his money on new belts."

Riku "Talk about a coincidence, Sora is going on a date with Kairi this Friday at McDonalds too. He spent all his money on a pimpin chain necklace. Believe me I was with him when he bought it."

Axel walks out of a black portal.

Axel "Talk about bitches with a capital B."

Riku "Huh. Who are you talking about?"

Axel "You're so called best friends, Leon and Sora."

Riku "I guess."

Cloud "Yeah."

Axel "Going out with the girls you like knowing that you like them. Doesn't sound like best friends to me."

Riku "Well, I never really told Sora that I liked her because I knew that he had a thing for her too."

Axel "Exactly. But he never told you and you knew, a best friend always knows.

Cloud "Yeah I told Leon and he went after her anyways just to piss me off."

Riku "Ughh! I'm so mad."

Axel "Oh don't get mad, get even."

Cloud "Yeah! Let's sabotage their dates."

Riku "Yeah …………… but how?"

Axel "Your smart boys, use your imagination."


	2. Planning and Shopping

Chapter 2

Riku and Cloud go to Riku's house to plan what they called "Operation Stabbed Back". Riku got out a pen and paper and sat on his bed. Cloud sat on his chair next to his bed.

Riku "lets start brain storming"

Cloud "We don't want to hurt them… physically"

Riku "Right we just want to hurt them by making the girls hate them"

Cloud "yeah I'll go in disguise as a customer and you can-

All of a sudden a blackish purple feather falls in front of Cloud and Sephiroth comes out of the darkness.

Seph. "Cloud you'll never let go of the darkness"

Cloud "Shut up I don't have time for you"

Seph. "What do you mean? I'm your arch enemy"

Cloud "well I got a new one so move a long right now"

Seph. " But … Fine. If you have a new arch enemy then so do I"

Sephiroth disappears into the darkness.

Cloud "Some people just can't take rejection"

While Riku and Cloud are plotting, Kairi and Namine are at the mall.

Kairi "So Sora said Roxas will go on a double date with you"

Namine "Well in that case I need a new dress let's go in here"

The go in the store and are trying on dresses.

Kairi "Isn't Sora so cute?"

Namine "Yeah I'll hit that but Roxas is hot"

They come out of the stalls and looked in the mirror. Namine's dress looked the same as her usual dress just with a padded bra built in. Kairi looks at Namine.

Kairi "Wow why do you have boobs all of sudden?"

Namine "Oh this dress has a built in bra, does it make me look sluttish?"

Kairi "Oh yeah"

Namine "Perfect" 


	3. Where are we going?

Chapter 3

Roxas "So how are we getting to McDonald's?"

Sora "How about you get one of your older friends to drive us?"

Roxas "I know I'll call Axel and see if he can take us"

Roxas grabs his cell phone and calls Axel. He stands there waiting for Axel to pick up.

Axel "Talk to me"

Roxas "Hey Axel this is Roxas since Sora and I can't drive I was wondering if you could drive us to McDonald's?"

Axel "Hmm… Well since I have nothing going on tonight…Why not?"

Roxas "Thanks Axel you sure are a pal, pick us up at 7:00"

Axel "Which car do you want me to take? The Range Rover or the Mustang?"

Roxas "The Range Rover since it's bigger"

Axel "Ok see yah at 7"

Roxas "Thanks bye"

Roxas turns to face Sora.

Roxas "Yes we have a ride"

Axel picks up Roxas, Sora and the girls in the Range Rover. Axel driving, Roxas in the passenger seat and Sora in the back with the ladies ( wink wink). Axel looks over at Roxas and whispers to him.

Axel "Are you still up for the plan so you can get out of this date?"

Roxas "Yeah you just wait outside McDonalds and I'll scratch my head and that'll be the signal ok?"

Axel "You got it"

Kairi "So where are we going? Olive Garden, TGI Friday's, Cheesecake Factory or my favorite Abuelo's"

Sora "Uh… McDonald's"

Namine "McDonald's! Where'd you find these cheapskates?"

Sora "Well… I kind of spent all my money on my new pimping gangsta necklace"

Roxas "We're here thanks for the ride Axel"

Axel "Sure… Where's my tip?"

Sora "What! I'm broke remember?"

Axel "Ha ha. Just kidding."

Sora "Oh man you almost had me there"

Roxas whispers back to Axel.

Roxas "Remember when I scratch my head-"

Axel "I come in and get you yeah yeah I got it"

Roxas "Perfect see you later then"

Mean while Riku and Cloud are in disguises. Cloud as a regular customer and Riku as a cashier at the register. Secretly with out knowing Sephiroth is a disguised as a Mexican janitor looking for Cloud's new enemy so he can eliminate him and become Cloud's arch enemy once more.

I hope you like the first three chapters and the next two chapters are coming soon! So leave a bunch of comments! Thank You!

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	4. The Big Finale

Chapter 4

Sora "what's going to be ladies? Please get something off the dollar menu and no large fries or soda's only small stuff"  
Kairi "Oh it's ok I'm anorexic so I won't be eating but Namine and is bulimic and will end up throwing up all her food anyways"  
Roxas "Then that's just a waste of money"  
Namine "alright just this once I won't throw anything up"  
Kairi "Alright I guess I'll eat something too. Alright I will have the Asian Salad oops I mean the SMALL Asian Salad"  
Sora "Thank you"  
Namine "I'll have the same"  
Riku "what are you two boys getting"  
Roxas "umm… umm…umm…umm"  
Riku "TODAY PLEASE uh I mean today please" (in a deeper tone to disguise his voice.  
Roxas "Ok fine I'll have the #5"  
Sora "the #5 that's $2.50 if you get that then we're sharing"  
Roxas "what ever I'm not that hungry anyways"  
Sora "oh yeah no soda's just water"  
Kairi "you said we can get small soda's"  
Sora "I was being sarcastic"  
Riku "that'll be $4.50 here's your cups for water"  
Sora "thanks"

Roxas grabs the cups and fills them up with water and gives one of the cups of water to Namine, while Namine grabs the cup one of the customers (Cloud in disguise) bumps into Roxas knocking all of the water onto Namine's new dress. Making the tissues in her bra shrivel up making her boobs look 3 sizes smaller.

Namine "Ah what the hell"  
Roxas "Oh I' am so sorry. Here let me help"

Roxas grabs some napkins and is patting down Namine's chest.

Roxas "why are you boobs all soggy?"

Namine jerks away and covers her chest.

Namine "I need to go to the bathroom"  
Kairi "I'll go with you"

Sora puts the cups on the counter and looks at Riku.  
Sora "Can you refill these please?"

Riku grabs the cups and refills them and gives them to Sora. Sora goes over to Roxas who's cracking up at the moment and puts them on the table.

Roxas "This date is going smooth"  
Sora "C'mon at least act like you want to be here"  
Roxas "Ok I'll try"  
Mean while Cloud is walking past Leon's table while Sephiroth is right behind him mopping looking for his new enemy.  
After they pass Leon and Aerith's table Leon gets up to get some more ketchup. Then he slips on the water and falls on his ass.

Leon "Oh shit"  
Aerith "OMG are you okay Leon"  
Leon "I just slipped and fell on my ass on hard marble floor and made an idiot out of my self in front of a bunch of people, do you think I'm okay!  
Aerith "So, that's a yes"  
Leon "Just forget it. I'm going to get some more ketchup"  
Finally Roxas and Sora grab their food and take it to their table. Then Kairi and Namine get back and they all start eating. Roxas was next to Sora and across from Namine and Sora sat across from Kairi. Sora nudges Roxas to start talking.  
Roxas "Oh um……sorry about the water Namine"  
Namine "Forget about it" Roxas "It's going to be hard to- I mean, it's already forgotten."

Roxas thoughts "Man this date is boring. Namine must of stuffed her bra with tissues in the bathroom because her boobs are even bigger than they were before! Huh I'm giving Axel the signal any second because this is the date from hell.  
Sora owes me big time for this."

All of the sudden Cid the crazy hick comes in the fast food joint drunk and fling beer everywhere.

Cid "There you are! You stupid slut"  
He points at Aerith and starts walking towards her table.

Cid "I loved you an' you just kicked me to the curb like I was road kill. And for what?" He looks at Leon. "Leon? You left me for this this …fluffy jacket wearer."

Cloud and Riku grab Cid by the arms and start dragging him out of the restaurant.

Cid "Leon! Don't fall in there trap. She's an evil she devil! She'll crush you're"  
Cloud and Riku finally dragged him out of the restaurant.

Riku "We should take him home"  
Cloud "Yeah. Here let's get him on my motorcycle."

Meanwhile, back in the restaurant Sephiroth Pulls off his disguise and points at Leon.

Seph. "Leon! This is the end for you. Once I eliminate you I shall be Cloud's arch enemy once again."

Sephiroth grabs his sword out and is fixing to stab Leon. Thinking fast, Leon pulled Aerith in front of him and moved out of the way. Sephiroths blade went through Aerith like how those toothpicks with the colorful things on the end go through sandwiches.Just then Cloud comes back into the restaurant to find his keys and sees Aerith being stabbed. "Aerith.  
Noooooo!" He shouts running. Sephiroth pulls the blade out of Aerith and Cloud runs and catches her as she falls to the ground. He feels her pulse .  
Cloud "She's dead. You killed her again Sephiroth, my arch enemy"  
Seph. "So I'm your arch enemy again ha ha! I guess I don't need to take out that other guy anymore"  
Cloud "This time Sephiroth, you're going down"  
Seph. "Bring it then"

Cloud and Sephiroth both leap into the air and disappear to finish the fight!  
Axel on the other hand is in the Range Rover snacking down on french-fries and spying with his binoculars waiting for the signal from Roxas.

Axel " Wow dinner and a show this is better than I thought it was going to be. Stupid Sora, Roxas should be going on doubles dates with me, when I light his shoe on fire that will show him that little brown haired twerp seriously who has brown hair its silver, blonde or red"  
Axel sees the Roxas scratch his head

Axel "That's my queue"

Axel runs into the fast food joint pretending to catch his breath looking for Roxas.

Axel " Roxas! Xemnas just called and emergency meeting"  
Roxas " What"  
Axel " Yeah, I know late notice we must leave now, I'm so sorry"  
While Sora wasn't looking Axel snaps his finger and starts a little fire on Sora's shoes.  
Roxas " Sorry to cut this date short you understand don't you Namine"  
Namine "Yeah I understand"

Axel grabs Roxas by the arm and runs out before Sora notices his shoes are on fire.  
Sora, Kairi and Namine begin sniffing wondering where the strange smell is coming from.

Namine " Do you smell that"  
Kairi "Yeah, where's it coming from"  
Sora " Ah, its my shoes they're on fire!"

Sora stands up immediately to take the fire out but steps on all of the alcohol Cid spilled on the floor and the whole entire restaurant is caught on fire everyone left in there dies even Sora, Kairi and Namine even Aerith's body turns to ashes!  
3 Days Later Riku, Roxas, Axel and their other friends are at Sora's tombstone, in their black Organization robes since that's all they had that was black. Roxas has his hand on Sora's tombstone and has flowers in the other and lays them in front of the stone.

Roxas "Well Sora I guess I'm all what's left of you in the world, It's been nice knowing you"

Axel walks up to the tombstone and says to himself in side his head ( Sucker Roxas is all mine and is my best friend now and forever "Got it Memorized") Axel walks away from the tombstone and stands between Roxas and Riku. Riku walks up and lays his hand on the stone and says.

Riku "Well Sora, I'm just sorry I spit in your last meal. But, Roxas is right he's all that's left of you and I'm sure we're going to be best friends"  
Axel's thoughts "What!" Axel's jaw drops and eyes widen and feels like burning Riku's shoes.  
To Be Continued ... 


End file.
